Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Home Videos

I got this email containing very private home photos of a student at one of the Kenyan Universities in the throes of seducing and posing her "man". The story doing the rounds is apparently that the man in question was jilted and in an act of vengeance, he's decided to humiliate her (what else could it be) by sharing those photos with all and sundry. Basically they are on the web that catches everything, spreads it like a bush fire and never forgets.
 
My first thought was, "This could have been my sister/daughter/cousin/friend!". I guess that's why I immediately deleted them from my inbox and trashbin - I do not want to be part of the chain that's gleefully spreading someone's pain. So, sorry, do not send in requests for forwards tafadhali.
 
Second was, "What the heck was she thinking!!!". Then it hit me, oh yeah. She was in love. What the F#$%#$%@%!@$#!$#@$!$#$K!!!  
 
Third was, "She waxes."
 
Seriously though, when did it become the "in thing" to allow photos as such taken of you. All while you are presumably sober. By someone who you are not married to. Aarrghh! I shudder to think that perhaps he's even shared them in the past with The Boyz but back then it was the Boyz's dirty secret. There's already enough porn in this world to keep him well occupied anyway; why add to his stash. Just how many others have been photographed before? He could easily be sending the snaps to porn sites. It boggles the mind.
 
And when did it become the accepted and manly to humiliate someone you once loved. Honestly methinks it is simply a demonstration of how immature the dude is. I really tried to think of what could have driven him to such extremes and I honestly fail to understand. So he was heartbroken. Bah humbug! Billions of hearts (and pride) have been broken before - and they have proven that they mend. I mean, isn't that the whole point of relationships? That you go in not knowing whether it will really last; that uncertainty is what adds the flavour. So shouldn't you be ready for heart break? 
 
I dont know what to make of this situation. I cannot help but feel sorry for the student - it must be the lowest point of her life.
 
I think I am either a prude or old. I understand carefree sexy posing - hell, I revel in it. But you unleash a camera and the next course of action will be, "To Bobbit or not to Bobbit, that is the question".

It's been ages since I even shared a joke...and I have plenty. But today it will be a lesson in history. Yep. Giving The Bird 101.
 

The History of the Middle Finger

 

Well, now......here's something I never knew before, and now that I know it, I feel compelled to send it on to my more intelligent friends in the hope that they, too, will feel edified. Isn't history more fun when you know something about it?

 

Before the Battle of Agincourt in 1415, the French, anticipating victory over the English, proposed to cut off the middle finger of all captured English soldiers.  Without the middle finger it would be impossible to draw the renowned English longbow and therefore they would be incapable of fighting in the future.

 

This famous English longbow was made of the native English Yew tree, and the act of drawing the longbow was known as "plucking the yew" (or  pluck yew").

 

Much to the bewilderment of the French, the English won a major upset and began mocking the French by waving their middle fingers at the defeated French, saying, See, we can still pluck yew!  Since 'pluck yew' is rather difficult to say, the difficult consonant cluster at the beginning has gradually changed to a labiodentals fricative F', and thus the words often used in conjunction with the one-finger-salute!  It is also because of the pheasant feathers on the arrows used with the longbow that the symbolic gesture is known as "giving the bird."

 

IT IS STILL AN APPROPRIATE SALUTE TO THE FRENCH TODAY!

 

And yew thought yew knew every plucking thing.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ahem! Angalia kwa inXcess. Ahem! is all that i shall venture, tihii!!

Then she waxes... hmmm?

To bobbit? Haiya, holding tightly onto bolingos!

Anonymous said...

oh, me i am first!

Anonymous said...

Hehehehehe, pluck the yew, every plucking thing eh? Heheh!!

Nani kaa mimi? First, second and third!

gishungwa said...

Poor girl. All i can think of is the things we do in the name of love.

Unknown said...

That forward should be a lesson to all that there is no such thing as a secret between two people. I an all for posing for your man or gal but no snaps please! if you want more sini it's more fun to and back for more poses.

Seasons & Reasons said...

I have received the email too and I totally blame the chick. What the hell was she thinking posing for a dude like that?

From what I hear, it is the dude's pal who sambazad the pictures after the chick herself gave him a flashdisk not knowing she did not delete the photos

egm said...

The height of madness is taking the pictures and storing them on your work computer. The IT guy at work told me of a computer he was working on for one of the sales team women that had plenty showing her and her boyfriend in various stages of undress and physical interaction.

Anonymous said...

For the sake of truth and justice I implore anyone out there who has those pictures to send me out some copies!
On the other hand just say no to cameras, who knows where the pics may end up!

3N said...

The story of that chile is very sad if indeed true. She was naïve and the guy is continuing to mock her pain or love / lust lost. Anway I don’t believe in being vengeful if you kosana with your loved one, swallow it with pride and wish them the best.

If at one time you truly loved someone I don’t see how you would ever want them to suffer or worse torment them yourself.

As for the frenchie salute, I will pass.

And how can I see these pics, I want to sympathize with the young lady. lol

Anonymous said...

SO ITS TRUE THAT CHIC IS KENYAN, wo lo lo lo lo lo

Ok Ok Ok. I have also deleted. Last forward to 3N. She needs all the sypathy she can get.

@Seasons & Reasons - you seem to have the 411 on the story. fill us in bana. digits ivi ivi

Anonymous said...

Who is to blame when one is not careful? Huyo dem alijichimbia kaburi.